Report by: wrestlingobserver.com
Video recap of Kurt/Vince/Eddie from last week opens the show -- the same recap as was seen on the Smackdown rebound on RAW. Pyro hits and Booker T comes out with pyro.
Booker says he wants whoever the new GM is to honor Angle's word and award him the U.S. title. Kenzo Suzuki comes out and says he deserves it, with a geisha girl translating for him. Booker got in a funny line about wanting the GM, not the owner of a sushi bar. RVD came out, immediately followed by Renee Dupree, Luther Reigns, Billy Gunn, Charlie Haas, and finally John Cena to a massive pop. Cena says the fans know who should be the champ, and started an eight-man brawl. Vince McMahon came out and said only one man can decide who should be champ: The new General Manager ... Theodore R. Long! Long said one man deserves the title, and Booker interrupts to say thank you. Long said he didn't mean Booker and says Booker doesn't deserve a thing for hating on Smackdown all the time. He says there will be an eight-man elimination match for the title tonight.
Spike Dudley d. Rey Mysterio to win the WWE Cruiserweight title. Good match w/ no commercial break because it was relatively short. Finish came when D-Von ran out from the back to yell at the ref and Spike as Spike was in position for the 619. Bubba ran out from the crowd and tripped up Mysterio on the other side of the ring, and Spike hit the Acid Drop for the win. After figuring out his half-brothers had helped, he was angry and tried to apologize to Rey.
Recap of the JBL/Taker stuff from last week.
Teddy Long tells the divas they will not be underutilized anymore, then walks into his GM office, where he finds Kurt Angle. Angle said he was packing up but Luther already did it for him. Kurt makes comments about Teddy being the first black GM, and Long said that thinking is from 1985. He said Kurt will be in a match TONIGHT, but Kurt starts making excuses, finally settling on not having his wrestling gear. Long says he will be fined $1,000 for not being prepared for work, and Kurt will wrestle next week! "Get ta steppin'!" Long tells Kurt.
Paul London and Billy Kidman d. the Dudleys to retain the WWE Tag Team Championship. This appeared to have a commercial break, and it was a pretty good match. The finish came when Bubba tried to hit Kidman outside the ring with a chair, but Mysterio ran out from the crowd to get revenge, and he dropkicked the chair back into Bubba. D-Von was promptly pinned in the ring by London.
Ivory interviews Mick Foley at the Democratic National Convention.
Eddie Guerrero starts his lowrider going into commercial.
Hilarious SummerSlam commercial shows Batista doing a floor routine in a gymnastics competition.
Eddie comes out with something covered in the lowrider to a huge pop. He wants Kurt to meet him face-to-face, but Kurt won't do it, so Eddie tells the crew to unveil stuff in the lowrider: stolen items from Kurt's old GM office. He decides to auction them off on WWE.com. Kurt still doesn't budge. He says the false cast needs some lysol with it, the picture with Kurt and Heyman with a WWE championship belt should be used for a bathroom because it makes him want to go, and he'll get his cousin to put hydraulics on Kurt's wheelchair. Eddie draws a mustache and an "I suck" saying on another Kurt picture, then finds the gold medals. He tries to auction them off to a Cincinnatian for $1, but Kurt finally comes out. He says if Eddie won't give back his stuff, he'll steal the lowrider. Eddie says don't do it because there's an anti-theft device. Kurt says "Nice try" but turns the key and gets powdered in the face! Eddie says the only thing that would make the night better !
is stealing Kurt's music, which plays. Huge "You Suck" chants as Kurt leaves. Entertaining and strong segment.
Next week: Kurt Angle in action, Spike/Rey vs. the Dudleys.
JBL commercial a la a politician's commercial airs recounting his playing football with a broken leg, going behind enemy lines to entertain troops, and being the Mexican, Korean, European and WWE Champion. So over-the-top that it works.
Booker T won the 8-man elimination match for the U.S. title. Eliminations as follows:
Charlie Haas eliminated by Billy Gunn's fameasser. Dupree eliminated by Luther Reigns' finisher. Cena comes in and gets into it with Luther. It spills outside and Kenzo Suzuki hits Cena with the belt from behind, getting DQed. Billy Gunn is next to go with the FU. Luther gets the FU soon after and is gone. The finish was splendid, as RVD caught Cena with the 5-star frog splash. Booker stole the pin and eliminated Cena and quickly caught RVD with a vicious scissors kick to win the match and the title. RVD's head was driven down hard and it looked convincing from my vantage point.
Booker celebrates on the ramp and leaves. End of show.
RVD and Cena shake hands and salute the fans while leaving the arena. That was it.
1. John Cena
2. Eddie Guerrero
3. Rob Van Dam
4. Rey Mysterio
1. Kurt Angle
2. John Bradshaw Layfield
3. Renee Dupree
No Undertaker was kind of disappointing, but otherwise it was an excellent show.