Report by: pwtorch.com
SMACKDOWN TAPINGS
(1) Rey Mysterio defeated Eddie Guerrero in a good match. The middle part had a lot of restholds, highlighted by that spot where Eddie stands on his head during a keylock applied submission. Eddie tried to cheat, but was not successful.
Teddy Long met with Heidenreich and the returning Paul Heyman. They tried to cancel the Royal Rumble match, and eventually Teddy called for a match tonight with both men versus the Undertaker.
(2) Funaki defeated Akio in a Crusierweight title match. The action was solid. But Carlito came out and did commentary at ringside, so the match was just a backdrop. He had a petition and even tried to get the referee to sign, even though he was busy calling the match.
Daniel Puder met Torrie Wilson and Jackie backstage. He acted like a heel toward Jackie, so Puder is a heel now. He made light of her relations with men during Tough Enough 2 and with Charlie Haas.
John Cena faced Kenzo Suzuki in a rap battle. Funny stuff, but nothing great. Kenzo stole Torrie Wilson's Great American Bash outfit, well it looks like that anyways. Cena brought out the worthless Raw Diva ripoffs to bait Kenzo away from Hiroko. It ended with a mild melee with Cena on top. It seems Cena may be back to form on the mic, but it is sickening to hear all the fan-pandering he does. Sheesh, the Chain Gang? It seems that Smackdown is the early-'90s version of the WWF and Raw is trying to be the tweaked up Attitude era version.
(3) Kurt Angle beat a ''local'' hero via a quick tapout. Kurt said if anyone beat him in less than three minutes he would give up the medals. The jobber tapped out in less than 30 seconds. I believe that when asked where the jobber was from, the jobber said ''right here in Connecticut.'' It was so bad because, even though we're not the biggest state, you can at least say a town by name.
(4) Doug Basham (w/Danny Basham) & Orlando Jordan beat Rob Van Dam (w/Rey Mysterio). A switcheroo was performed to finish the match. Rey was sent to the back early in the match. Short match that should've been longer. The Bashams new music sounds like a rip-off of the Kill Bill V.1 theme song.
Amy Weber tried to seduce Kurt Angle. Later, Angle met Amy in her locker room. He got undressed to his undies and went into the shower, but it was Diva Joy instead. Joy ran out of the room in only a towel. Angle chased after her, but she ran into the Big Show. Who then chased Angle (with his pants back on) to the ring. Luther Reigns and Mark Jindrak came out to even the odds, but all were not enough to tackle Show. Jindrak got chokeslammed. Angle then hit Show with a chair, but it didn't faze him. Kurt then got punched in the face with the chair, if you know what I mean.
A skit aired where JBL made his only Smackdown appearance of the night. It was about Amy telling how she deceived Angle into going to Joy's locker room.
(5) Undertaker fought Heidenreich & Paul Heyman in a handicap match to a no contest. If Heidenreich won, he could change the casket stipulation of the Royal Rumble match. Midway through the match, Undertaker did the bow to the urn thing, which brought out druids carrying two coffins. One was to be used for the post show dark match. Heidenreich got scared and ran away. Extra security lined up in the area he ran in. Nice way to let fans know something will be up. It left Heyman alone in the ring, and Taker gave him a tombstone and put him in the casket to end the taping.
DARK MATCH
(1) After the taping ended, JBL came out with Orlando Jordan for the advertised ''just for us'' (i.e. not taped) Handicap Casket match. They seemed to be phoning it in, and the match wasn't that good, but it was nice to have a match just for the fans in the arena. It ended with Taker barely fitting the WWE Champion and Orlando in the casket simultaneously. It didn't actually close, but it was good enough for the referees to call it as the win for Taker. He celebrated, and then the show ended.
Matches announced for next week in Florida. A four-way tag title match with Rey & RVD vs. The Bashams vs. Booker T & Eddie vs. Luther & Jindrak. Also a U.S. Title match between Cena and Kenzo Suzuki.
Personal notes: I made a list of things that I wanted to see at this show. (Hey, I was bored at work) Let's see if any of them were fulfilled. In no particular order:
(1) Eddie Guerrero do a frog splash. NOPE
(2) RVD do a frog splash. NOPE
(3) Rey hit the 619...and connect. NOPE
(4) JBL do a promo. Well he kind of did a small one before the dark match. YES
(5) I want to see Shannon Moore wrestle. NOPE
(6) I want to hear the music of Booker T, Heidenreich, and Chavo. All three...YES
(7) I want to see a good cruiserweight Velocity match. NOPE.
(8) I want a John Cena match. NOPE
(9) I want to see Kurt Angle do 3 of his spots. 1 out of 3...the Anglelock only. NOPE
(10) The Undertaker...to do something...anything good. Well, he did wrestle 2 matches in a row, and both were handicap matches, so YES.
I was not expecting anything out of the show. So it neither disappointed or got me too excited. It was a fun thing to go to. Like the time I expected Stone Cold to return to Raw (circa early 2003) and it did not happen, now THAT is disappointing.
Also I went with my roommate. I got him to start watching it. He only watches Smackdown, and he doesn't know the difference between Raw and Smackdown, so I tell him it's the Red ropes show and the blue ropes show. He also likes Big Show because he's tough and Undertaker because he's intimidating. He hates JBL because he's a coward and Kurt Angle because he's sneaky. It's really funny because that is exactly how Vince McMahon wants his characters portrayed.
