I Miss…
When Steve Austin would walk down the aisle with his shaved head, black vest, black tights and black boots and knowing, without any doubt, that he'd be dedicated to having a very good match.
Jimmy Snuka's Superfly Splash. In my eyes, nobody could ever do it better.
Seeing and hearing a sellout crowd at Raw, Smackdown and PPVs every week.
Sunny. Not just because he was so hot, but because she had charisma, microphone skills and everything about her persona was just perfect.
Every damn thing about Randy Savage.
When the term "wrestler" was used more commonly than "sports entertainer."
Being able to see AJ Styles perform. There is no finer "young" wrestler on the planet today, for my money. At least I can see him in TNA again because I'm too cheap to order PPVs or DVDs.
Watching WCW Saturday night before Nitro became the "it" show for WCW.
Jumping onto the computer after Raw finishes in order to read about Nitro since I had to watch it on tape delay in Canada.
The Four Horsemen sign, just as long as it wasn't Steve McMichael or Paul Roma doing it.
The 1997 version of the Undertaker. The 2002 version was pretty good too.
Yokozuna's Banzai Drop. While I was never a big Yoko fan, the move was excellent because once he hit it you knew the match was over.
Hulk Hogan saying, "Well you know something Mean Gene…"
Sting. Not the crow version, but the one in the early '90s that really turned this Canadian kid that didn't have access to WCW into a fan of the company.
Dawn Marie's behind.
John Cena as a heel, when he was really edgy.
Actually being excited when Ultimate Warrior's music hit because the adrenaline in the building always picked up when that anthem sounded.
Laughing at how bad El Gigante/Giant Gonzalez was.
The excitement I had every time I watched a match from WCW's cruiserweight division.
Seeing those nWo and Austin 3:16 t-shirts everywhere.
When Stevie Ray was announcing in WCW and using the phrase "it's on like neckbone" way too much.
Shitting my pants every time I saw Jake Roberts on TV because nobody in the history of wrestling has ever been as scary as that guy.
Missy Hyatt's cleavage.
Andre the Giant. I remember being 11 years old and begging my dad to take me to Niagara Falls to meet Andre when he made an appearance there. I remember when we finally made it to the end of the line, I got to shake Andre's hand and after I shook it he palmed my head with his hand. We had the picture somewhere, but it's lost now. The story will never be forgotten, though.
Seeing WrestleMania live. It's been 15 years since I was at WrestleMania 6. I would LOVE to see WM22 in Chicago.
Those WWF albums from the '80s. Mean Gene singing "Tutti Fruity" is a classic in my book.
The word "slapnuts."
Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan as an announce team. I don't know if they're the best announce team ever, nor do I care. All I know is they are my favorite.
Vader. The best "big man" ever, for me.
Watching the trio of Tajiri, Super Crazy and Little Guido (Nunzio) have terrific matches in ECW when I would watch it on the TNN (now Spike TV).
The rude, obnoxious, overbearing and annoying heel character of Shawn Michaels. I'm glad that he's become a better person now, but heel HBK might be my favorite character ever.
Wondering what the fuck Sid Vicious was saying whenever he had a microphone in his face.
Tough Enough. The first and third seasons especially. It's a shame that WWE is too afraid to "expose" the business now by holding another real TE season.
Linda McMahon trying to act.
Tazz singing Ernest Miller's theme song as he entered the 2004 Royal Rumble.
How cheesy those skits were with Mark Henry as a womanizer, first with Chyna and then with Mae Young.
Almost tearing up when I saw Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero embrace as World Champions to end WrestleMania XX.
Those thumb wrestlers that WWE used to sell.
Mr. Perfect slapping his gum out of the air.
When HHH was funny. I still laugh when I remember his guest commentating and when he uttered the famous (at least to me) line of "Testes, Testes…1…2…3." Yes, I'm immature.
My illegal cable box that provided me with free wrestling PPVs, among other things, for a dozen years.
Hearing Scott Hall say, "Hey yo."
The Hardys vs. The Dudleys vs. Edge & Christian all the time. I'll never get tired of good tag team wrestling.
All those wrestlers that died far too soon.
The jobbers of my youth like "Iron" Mike Sharpe, Barry Horowitz, Barry O and Jimmy Powers, to name a few.
The Claw.
The theme music of the Mean Street Posse. I'm 100% serious. That tune was classic.
Rick Rude saying, "What I'd like to have right now…" before he insults the fans.
Bret Hart for everything he did in his career. I miss people talking about Bret WITHOUT talking about what happened in Montreal in November of 1997. I miss hearing his music, watching him put his shades on a lucky kid at ringside, and watching him wrestle a great match regardless of his opponent.
When main event level matches could end without a ref bump.
Piper's Pit. Always will be the best wrestling "talk show" ever. You never knew what would happen there.
Jay Leno wrestling in PPV main events. Okay, maybe not.
The way the Hollywood Blondes would "film" as they made their way to the ring.
Those Los Guerreros skits that WWE produced a couple years back.
Dino Bravo. Why? Because he was Greek. That's why.
When the wrestlers competing in a title match were introduced as they stood in separate corners in the ring, rather than as they walk down the aisle. It's much more professional, in my opinion.
Watching Kurt Angle matches without praying that the guy doesn't end up seriously hurt because of all the injuries he's amassed.
WCW's internet show, WCW Live, which really was revolutionary at a time when we internet fans could really use it.
Logging onto the usual sites on the internet on Tuesday/Wednesday to see how Raw and Nitro fared in the ratings.
Being a mark. Sometimes. Not all the time.
Kimberly Page's body. Yummy.
Reading WWE house show reports when the likes of Austin and Rock would stick around a half hour entertaining the fans after drawing an 18,000 people sellout and wishing I would get to see one of those shows.
Ted Dibiase's promos. He was great at everything. I just found his interviews to be exceptional.
Wondering what that "GTV" stuff was all about.
Driving nearly three hours in the middle of the winter on a Monday and Tuesday in a small car with three friends to see Raw tapings in Michigan because the product was so hot at the time. Those trips are special.
That Jason Sensation dude that did those imitations of wrestlers.
The Rock. His promos, his facial expressions, his professionalism, and his ability to always make everybody around him better.
Being so into a storyline that I almost cried, the way I did at the end of the Savage/Warrior WM7 match when Savage reunited with Elizabeth.
Hearing Tazz say, "Here Comes The Pain" as Brock Lesnar's music hit. It never got annoying to me.
How intimidating Demolition looked as they walked down the aisle.
Two and a half words: Al F'N Wilson.
How hard I laughed when Brian Pillman caused Bobby Heenan to swear on live TV because he surprised him while they were on the air.
Paul Heyman booking Smackdown. I still say that the six months that Heyman really had control of Smackdown to end 2002 was the best time of any during the brand extension.
Driving to the arena with my family to watch WrestleMania on closed circuit TV at the local hockey arena. It may sound stupid, but watching wrestling on a screen with a few thousand other wrestling fans can be a surreal experience.
When there were only four PPVs in a WWE year. It really made all of them special.
Writing about wrestling the way I used to. Remembering why I liked writing about it so much. This column helped to remind me of those reasons.
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This column was, simply put, a list of things that I miss as a wrestling fan of over 20 years. Some were serious, some were jokes. They were totally random and were simply written in the order that they came up in my head. As wrestling fans, we all miss things. Email Me about what you miss in wrestling and I could share some of them in a future column. Thanks for reading.
Smell ya later,
John C - oratoryjohn@gmail.com
My Blog - Commentaries on Wrestling, the NFL, Lost and whatever else comes to mind. Updated regularly.
