Survivor Series 1991
Detroit, Michigan
Joe Louis Arena
November 28, 1991

Announcers: Gorilla Monsoon & Bobby "The Brain" Heenan

The show starts off with a video package of the happenings between Jake "The Snake" Roberts and "Macho Man" Randy Savage from Superstars this past weekend. Roberts attacked Macho and tied him in the ring ropes leaving his king cobra to viciously bite Savage in the arm. Jake later claimed that he thought the snake was devenmoized, but it turns out it hadnít been. A bloodied Savage became delirious and started hulucinating. Eventually, Elizabeth, Rowdy Roddy Piper, and a slew of WWF officials were able to rescue him from the ring and stretcher him out to a local hospital.

WWF President Jack Tunney issued a statement that he wonít allow Jake to participate in the Survivor Series as punishment, so to even the sides, both he and opposing team member Sid Justice will be taken off their respective teams, and their partners will have to wrestle three on three. Tunney bars all reptiles from ringside for future matches, and immediately reinstates Savage in the WWF. He orders a Savage vs. Roberts match this Tuesday in Texas in San Antonio. I can't say enough about the awesome Savage/Snake angle and the awesome snake biting incident from Superstars. Savage had some serious balls to let that snake chew his arm up.

Rowdy Roddy Piper, Vigil, Bret "Hitman" Hart & The British Bulldog vs. Ric Flair, "Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase, The Mountie & The Warlord
Bring on the managers- Sherri, Jimmy Hart, Harvey Whippleman and Mr. Perfect all come out with the heels, and are quickly escorted to the back as per the rules of this particular Survivor Series. Sherri, however, somehow manages to stay. At this point, Ric Flair is still carrying around his "Real World's Championship" with him, but this is after he's stopped using the real WCW Heavyweight Title. We are able to pretty clearly see that his "Real Worldís Championship Belt" tonight is a WWF Tag Team Title. Nice of Hawk and Animal to lend him one. Bret gets huge pops upon his entrance. This match has two legends in Bret and Flair, three classic wrestlers in DiBiase, Bulldog, and Rougeau, and an expert brawler in Piper. And Virgil certainly didn't suck. No dead weight here.

Piper and Teddy start. Sherri ends up in the ring and jumps on Piper, so Roddy plants a big wet kiss on her. I'm not sure who got the worst of that. The faces control DiBiase in a hammerlock and tag everybody in to work on it. They go through the rotation about twice, then Bret switches it up and misses a charge. You can easily hear DiBiase call the spot beforehand. Woops. DiBiase tags Flair, and Bret and Flair are in the ring together! Bret gets the better of him and tags in Bulldog for a slingshot and we get the classic Flair flop. Bulldog press slams him, and Piper tags in. The crowd goes nuts. A chopfest ensues, and Flair sells perfectly, falls to the floor and lands flat on his face. Back in, they tag out, and Warlord and Bulldog tease a test of strength. Itís the irresistible force against the immovable object, and the Warlord gets the better of Davey Boy. Heenan: "The immovable object just kicked the limey right in the face." The Mountie tags in, but Bulldog tags Bret, and the Mountie heads for the hills, letting DiBiase tag in for him. DiBiase controls, and The Mountie tags in while Bret is in a weakened state. Bret makes a smart tag to Bulldog and Heenan suggests that Bret ran away from the Mountie. Bulldog presses him, prompting Flair to come in without a tag and all hell breaks loose. Amongst the chaos, Bulldog gets the Running Powerslam on the Mountie. The ref counts two, but has to stop when the heels break it up. Flair illegally comes off the top with a forearm and gets the three on Davey Boy for the first elimination eleven minutes in. Piper goes nuts on all four of his opponents, but gets caught in their corner and worked over. Flair misses a kneedrop, and Piper gets the Figure Four on Flair! DiBiase makes the save, and The Mountie traps Piper in a Boston Crab. Piper works towards his corner and tags Virgil while still in the Crab. Virgil whoops on the Mountie, whose teammates all refuse to tag in. Eventually, we get the inevitable DiBiase/Virgil matchup, which DiBiase controls. The Warlord tags in and hooks the Full Nelson, but again all hell breaks loose. Bret comes off the top this time and nails Warlord with a forearm, allowing Piper to cover for the three count, seventeen minutes in. Piper goes for a quick rollup on DiBiase but only gets two. Virgil tags in and slaps the Dream on DiBiase, but Teddy counters beautifully by propelling Virgil into the corner. Tag to Flair for a back suplex, and the Mountie for a nice dropkick. Piper and Flair end up in there and Piper no-sells the chops and uses the dreaded eye poke. Piper goes nuts on the whole team and itís mayhem once again. All six men are in and the feuds pair off. Piper whips Flair into the buckle, and Ric does the Flair flip to the floor. The ref has no control and calls for the bell at 22:47. He DQís everyone that was brawling in the ring, but Flair was on the floor alone, and is ruled the sole survivor. Cheap but interesting ending. It would have been awesome to see what could have been if they gave it fourty minutes (which is where it was headed), especially considering the crap on the card that followed. Virgil could have schoolboyed DiBiase for a fluke win, prompting DiBiase to annialate him, softening him up for an easy Mountie pin. Bret could have beaten the Mountie, and THEN you push Flair as soundly beating Bret and Piper. THAT would put him over the top, but oh well. Flair would be the WWF Champion two months later anyway. Awesome match. ****1/4

Mean Gene is on the arena interview stage for an interview with the recently reinstated Randy Savage. Huge reaction for Macho, who talks about Jake and their upcoming match this Tuesday in Texas. Great promo until Elizabeth ruins it.

"Hacksaw" Jim Duggan, Sgt. Slaughter, The Texas Tornado & "El Matador" Tito Santana vs. Col. Mustafa, The Berzerker, Skinner & Hercules
Wow, bring on the crap. From eight solid workers to the bottom of the ladder. Sarge, incidentally, turned face after the Hogan blowoff, as it was the only thing left to do. Of course heíd done so much against the U.S. that it was tough to buy. I think Jim Niedhart was supposed to be in this match somewhere, but Flair and The Beverlys did a number on him to keep him out. Talk about your gimmicks: In this one we have a drill sargeant, a bullfighter, a storm, a crazed viking, an alligator man, and a complete and utter moron, that being Duggan. All in one match!

Skinner and Santana start, and thatís actually decent, dumb gimmicks aside. Sarge pins Mustafa, upon entering, eight minutes in. Tito takes care of Herc with the Jalepeno, and Sarge rolls up Skinner a minute after that, leaving the Berzerker four on one. Duggan hits the three point clothesline to finish it off, and all four survive. 14:18, which is way too much time for a DUD like this.

Gene is back on the interview stage, this time with Jake. Gene confronts him about his actions and calls him a sick man, so Jake thanks him. Roberts says that the finger should not be pointed at him. No snakes at ringside? Jake has always been the true snake, not the thing in the bag. Jake says that Elizabeth will have her ticket to Tuesday in Texas, a ticket to the other side, if you will. The Chili Peppers would go on to write a song about it years later. On Tuesday in Texas, donít expect the prince to wake Elizabeth up with a kiss. "You see, Savage, Tuesday in Texas is not the end; it is not the beginning. Itís not even the beginning of the end, yet the end of the begnning." Great line and a great promo. Trust me.

A Gravest Challenge recap is shown. Ric Flair confronts Hulk Hogan on Paul Bearerís Funeral Parlor; itís the two World Champs face to face! Flairís been waiting a long time for this. The Undertaker attacks Hogan from behind with the urn. Flair simultaneously holds both Titles up, probably becoming the only man in history to do that. Sweet. Hulk would come to know that other Title quite well in the coming years, huh? Taker rips off Hoganís cross, causing Piper and Savage make the save with chairs. Heh, Savage and Piper aiding Hogan? It happened.

World Title: Hulk Hogan (Champion) vs. The Undertaker
Uh-oh, midcard World Title Match. Hulkster beware. Taker with some slow offense, chokes and the like. Gorilla talks about the "Record Book" which of course shows only if you win or lose, not the nonsense surrounding it. Sound familiar? After minutes and minutes of chokes, Undie finally Tombstones him, but Hulk no-sells it and hulks up. Taker down to one knee after a clothesline, and Hogan rakes the eyes (because heís a role model, you know). Bodyslam. Flair makes his way to ringside and looks at the WWF World Title while Paul Bearer distracts the ref. Hogan, in a classless move, takes it upon himself to go to the floor and punch out the Nature Boy. Thatís not fair to Flair. He wasnít sticking his nose in Hulkís business; Hogan hit him first. Inside the ring, Hulk boots Taker, but Bearer distracts him as Taker sits up. The ref deals with Bearer again as Flair recovers and slides a chair into the ring. Taker tombstones Hogan on the steel chair and gets three at 12:45 for his first World Title. 1/2* for the outcome and Flair. The Dead Man drags the gold across the ground as Heenan proclaims Hulkamania, well... dead.

Hogan is hurt pretty badly. Heenan and Gorilla talk about Detroit Lions lineman Mike Uttley, though not by name, and how Hogan visited him in the hospital earlier in the week. Uttley, of course, suffered a neck injury on the field leaving him paralyzed. Gorilla fears the same for Hogan, but after five minutes, he walks off slowly with the help of officials. For the record, this was just the third time in seven years Hogan had been pinned. One time was really a one count with a crooked referee, the other was to the Ultimate Warrior (clean), but this, though it involved drastic cheating, was by far the most decisive.

Gene is with Piper. "It be a bad day in the WWF. The Undertaker being Champ ainít no different than David Duke being Prez." I see.

Sean Mooney is with Flair and Perfect. Great Flair rant.

Gene informs us that Tunney is conferencing with Hogan as we speak. Gene still wants to find the undefeated Champ, The Undertaker. He is instead joined by the Natural Disasters, I.R.S., and Jimmy Hart.

Mooney is with LOD and The Big Boss Man. Mooney tries to interupt Hawk by sending it over to Gene, but Hawk says, "Mooney, donít you EVER" and finishes his "Oh, what a rush" catchphrase. Well, that was just plain funny.

Gene is now with Tunney. Gene is so worked up, he looks like heís going to explode. Tunney orders a rematch which he will be at ringside for. The original match was still going on just TEN minutes ago, by the way. That was a quick conference and decision.

The Rockers & The Bushwackers vs. The Nasty Boys & The Beverly Brothers
Am I the only one that liked the Beverlys just a little bit? Hey, Butch is higher on the card than Hogan. This is towards the end of the Rockers, though theyíre still crazy over. This match is just basic tag action while Monsoon and Heenan talk about whatís just gone down. The Brain goes off on some funny tangents. He asks who the brains of the face team is, and when Gorilla responds that it must be Luke, he questions, "Luuuke?!", in a voice that has to be heard to be appreciated. Speaking of Luke, there he goes after a second rope clothesline from Knobbs. Jannetty, possibly stoned, botches a couple of leapfrogs, tripping on his landing. Shawn is flawless though. Gotta wonder if that had anything to do with who got the heel push, as this is their last major match together before the split. Gorilla canít tell the Beverlyís apart, so Heenan helps him out by telling him that the one with the long hair is Beau. The Beverlys, of course, both have long hair. Butch is gone courtesy of the Beverlyís spike slam, the Shaker Heights Spike. Think the 3D except using an X-Factor instead of a diamond cutter type move to finish it off. Marty seems confused as to what to do, but pulls out a nice hurricanrana. Itís 1991, so at that point itís called a "nice leverage move" by Gorilla. "Heck of a move", seconds Bobby. Enziguri by Jannetty, and I take back what I said earlier. My man Marty is on! Michaels tags in. In what I assume to be an effort to grow heelish, heís sporting chest hair for the first time in his career. Or maybe he finally hit puberty, I don't know. A rope splash by the Bevs gets two. Heenan is having the entire family over to his mansion in Beverly Hills for Thanksgiving Dinner tomorrow. Only $8 a head at the door. Backslide by Shawn, and Beau goes bye bye. Wow, that never works. Shawn still needs a tag however. Gorilla stirs up Rocker controversy but paints Marty as the heel because heís not reaching very far for the tag. Maybe thatís because heís all the way on the other side of the ring, Gorilla, but I could be wrong. Shawn debuts the awesome left armed flying clothesline from the apron to the floor. Yep, theyíre competing. Back in for the hot tag, and Marty goes bananas! Now Jannetty has a nice sequence in the ring. Theyíre pretty much just pushing each other harder. All five men remaining end up in the ring and Marty slams a Nasty, but the Nastysí leg smacks Shawn in the face in midair, causing Shawn to get pinned and eliminated. Marty has no clue what happened, but Shawn is pissed at him. Jannetty is left one on three and does alright for himself including a top rope crossbody to the floor, but soon the numbers catch up with him, and the heels finish him off at 23:05. The match dragged to start since it was following the main event, but it picked up once the Bushwackers were gone. **1/2, basically for the efforts of the Rockers.

Legion Of Doom & The Big Boss Man vs. The Natural Disasters & I.R.S.
Two cool signs: Look Out Dummies and Isnít Rotunda Stupid. Aren't acroynms fun? Gorilla mentions that Gene is looking for the Undertaker so he can get a word with him. Try the basement, Okerlund. Boss Man runs circles around Irwin in the ring while the announcers talk about more important things. Mooney is reportedly with Hogan, though we never see that interview. IRS nails Boss Man with the breifcase for the pin seven minutes in. He later accidentally hits Typhoon with it, causing him to be pinned and eliminated. Earthquake throws a major league hissy fit, takes Typhoon and leaves. Now itís just LOD vs. IRS two on one. IRS manages to work over Hawk as Heenan invites Gorilla over for Thanksgiving. "Thanks, but no thanks, Brain." Only eight bucks, you know. Very bad looking double knockout spot, so IRS goes for a suplex and Hawk gets it instead. Hot tag to Animal, who dominates. Irwin bails and decides to take the countout, but Boss Man comes down the aisle and forces him back into the ring. A suplex and a flying clothesline off the top later, and IRS is history, and so is Survivor Series. 15:21, * LOD and Boss Man celebrate. Anti-climactic ending to the show.

Gene is in the basement with Taker and Bearer. Hulkamania died at Survivor Series. This Tuesday is the burial. In other words, buy the PPV in six days for the rematch.

Most people view this as a throw away show, and it basically was. Two of the survivor matches were worthless (Duggan's match and the tag match), and the WWF Title Match was a snoozer. In fact, the only good match of the night had a cheap ending. Still, this all set up Tuesday In Texas, which in turn set up the epic 1992 Royal Rumble, which of course kicked off the awesome year of 1992. See, it can't be all bad.

Survivor Series 1991 Key Stats
Matches: 5
Total Wrestling: 88:16
Average Match: 17:39
Average Match Rating: *3/4
Top Moments: The awesome opener, Jake and Savage's promos, Taker's first Title win... and that's about it

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