WWE WrestleMania XXVIII Preview
By John Canton, Andrew Johnson & Christian Michael
Andrew Johnson: Hello, and welcome to the WrestleMania XXVIII preview column. This year's WrestleMania is being hyped as the biggest of all time, that is at least until next year. Either way, I'm excited to watch the "Granddaddy Of Them All" (because WrestleMania is the Rose Bowl, I guess) and I am looking forward to spending my entire Sunday either blogging about/watching pro-wrestling. It's like I'm fourteen again, only with a bigger waistline, more responsibilities, and a sudden realization that I've wasted my entire life. Haha, grown ups!
Since I'm sure many of you are racking your brains as to who you think is going to win this year's matches, the TJR editors are here to give your brains a rest and run down every match on the advertised card and let you know who we think will win. Hopefully our words will help stimulate your imaginations AND lower organs (ladies). Joining me as always is TJR Editor-In-Chief John Canton and Assistant to the Regional Editor Christian Michael. Now lets get this thing started with the first match, and quietly hope to ourselves a wild Funkasaurus stomps it's way onto the card before Sunday.
All photos courtesy of WWE.com
World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus
John Canton: I think this will be the opening match on the show. I have no idea if it will be. I don't have any "sources" to tell me that. It's just my hunch. The build to this match has been okay. There's really not too much to the story except that Bryan's the heel champ that is a bit scared of the powerful Sheamus, who is determined to knock Bryan's head off…metaphorically speaking. I'm torn on this one. I want Bryan to retain because I think that a potential feud with Orton following WM could be really awesome. Also, the last four Royal Rumble winners (Del Rio, Edge, Orton & Cena) all lost their title match at WrestleMania, so could Sheamus continue that trend? I think so. Keep the title on Bryan because he's doing a great job. Sheamus can be thrown into the mix at any time. I think Bryan/Orton is a money feud waiting to happen.
Winner: Daniel Bryan
Christian Michael: Odds this match gets moved to the pre-show again? As much as I want Bryan to win to really cement his place at the top, Sheamus has to win the match. Why? Because there needs to be prestige added back to winning the Royal Rumble. When WWE started the awesome "numbers" Royal Rumble videos the percentage of winners winning a title at WrestleMania was in the 70s. Now it's at 55% and that is because the Rumble winner hasn't won his Mania title match since Undertaker did so at 23. It's time that trend changes.
Predicted Winner and NEW World Heavyweight Champion- Sheamus
Andrew Johnson: The longer this feud has gone on the less heroic Sheamus has appeared. Don't get me wrong, Bryan is being a great D-bag to his girlfriend and is the epitome of the obnoxious guy that has achieved success through ill begotten means, but really their isn't a whole lot he's actually done to Sheamus that justifies this much aggression. I get that my boy D-Bry right here has the title and that makes other people instantly hate them because TARGET ON YOUR BACK but come on. Try to separate the whole AJ is being psychologically abused factor (because clearly Sheamus doesn't care either) and look at this situation: Daniel Bryan is a braggadocios champion who has fought hard to keep his title. Sheamus is a giant ginger that challenges people to matches by giving them his finishers for no apparent reason, and then calling them names because they don't like to eat meat or watch TV. Sheamus is a bully, and he's spent months talking about how much he hates bullies. Am I the only one that sees this? I mean, I don't really care if Sheamus is a bully or not, but for the love of God be consistent about it.
Basically I think the match is going to end with Sheamus standing over Bryan ready to make the kill, and then Daniel will play a video highlighting all of the recent events of Sheamus not being a star. Sheamus will then realize he has become what he hates, the sun will poke itself around the canopy and hit his pasty white skin, and he'll burst into flames and die.
Winner: Daniel Bryan
Cody Rhodes vs. Big Show
John Canton: I've liked this feud a lot. They've done a good job of making Cody the cowardly heel that only attacks Show when the opportunity presents itself while Show has yet to really get his hands on Cody since the feud began. This is a tough one to predict. On the one hand, Cody's had the title since the summer and could continue his really long reign as a dominant IC champ. On the other hand, Big Show has held every active title in WWE (that he's allowed to hold - sorry Divas Title) except for the IC Title. I wouldn’t hate it if he won. If Rhodes lost he could move up the card, which is what he deserves although there's no rush since he's still young. I'm going with Show although I can really see it going either way. I've flip-flopped on this one for weeks.
Winner: Big Show
Christian Michael: Show is mad that Cody has highlighted all his WrestleMania failures. So, you want to see Show get his revenge and beat Cody and make his WrestleMania moment. Only thing is, I don't. I respect Big Show, I just never cared much for him especially as a babyface. Cody is a future superstar in WWE and needs this win much more than Show does. The only way I could see Cody losing is if he's going to make a run at the World Heavyweight Championship but I don't think they're ready to do that yet.
Predicted Winner and STILL Intercontinental Champion- Cody Rhodes
Andrew Johnson: Cody Rhodes has been impeccable playing his part as the little shit that just won't lay off. Playing up Big Show's failings at WrestleMania would be enough for most performers to hang their hat on, but Cody has taken it several steps further. Last week when he handcuffed Big Show to the ropes and then channeled the spirit of Little Mac from Punch Out! to poke and prod the big dummy, was the zenith of douchey behavior. I'm a huuuuuge Cody Rhodes fan, but even I want to see his face transfered to The Big Show's knuckles. That's how you know someone is good; when they can get their biggest fan to admit they should get their ass kicked (not really though, I'm still rooting for Cody. Shhhh).
And get his ass kicked he will. Big Show is going to absolutely f**k Cody up, and the ref will be forced to DQ Show. Might want to stock up on animal tranquilizers, boys.
Winner by DQ: Cody Rhodes
Beth Phoenix & Eve vs. Kelly Kelly & Maria Menounos
John Canton: Like most people, I don't care about this match too much. The build has been pretty weak since Menounos hasn't even been on WWE TV to promote the match. They only shot the angle on the TV show Extra. Apparently Maria has two cracked ribs too, yet she's still in the match. Count me in with those that would have preferred Beth vs. Natalya in a singles match for the title since it would have been way better than this. I'll go with the faces to win because like we saw with Snooki last year if you're going to bring a "celebrity" woman in she's likely going to win.
Winners: Maria Menounos & Kelly Kelly
Christian Michael: Maria Menounos is one of the most beautiful women on the planet. I'll watch her walk out and then head to the bathroom. It's a four hour show. You gotta take a leak at some point.
Predicted Winners- Kelly Kelly and Maria Menounos
Andrew Johnson: Maria is very pretty, but I've already forgotten who she is three times while writing this sentence, so I don't have much hope for my interest in the match. It'll be quick, unsatisfying, and full of regret. Kind of like a night with me (again, ladies *wink*).
Winners: Maria Menounos & Kelly Kelly
Team Johnny vs. Team Teddy
John Canton: I'm one of those people that could really care less about who is in charge of the shows. They put way too much emphasis on who is in charge of what show. I'd rather see them use the TV time that Laurinaitis & Long get and instead invest in the younger talent that need better storylines to get over with the fans. The six on six match will end when one team scores a fall. That should lead to an exciting finishing sequence where most of the 12 guys will likely hit their finishing moves. My opinion is the common one with the heel team getting the win because Laurinaitis is the fresher TV character over a guy like Long, who really needs to be wished the best in his General Manager endeavors. Officially I'll go with Otunga getting the pin for his team at the 12 minute mark.
Winners: Team John Laurinaitis
Christian Michael: From what I've read, this is the match we got instead of Money in the Bank because WWE wanted Wade Barrett to win the briefcase and they decided to scrap the match after he got injured. I don't have a problem with this match. I usually like multi-man matches like this because they tend to be fun with everyone hitting their big moves. What I have a problem with is Dolph Ziggler being in this match. For the second straight year he was in a major title match at the Royal Rumble after being arguably the best in-ring performer in the company only to be stuck in a forgettable tag match. I'm waiting for the Dolph Ziggler WrestleMania classic. As for the stipulation in this match, I fully expect Team Johnny to win. Teddy Long's act is tired and heels usually work better as authority figures.
Predicted Winners- Team Johnny
Andrew Johnson: On paper this match is ridiculous. It's one of those things that could only happen in the world of professional wrestling; two men and their respective representatives are going to have a match to decide who will steal who's job. And it was a decision appointed by the board of the company. I would love for there to have been a camera in that meeting, where one board member says "How do we solve this GM drama?" and the other guy says "Well, clearly they need to lay it all on the line at WrestleMania, where it all begins again" and then everyone else just nods in approval. All except the one board member that has the sense to stand up and say "We are a publicly traded company worth millions. The person in charge of both Raw and Smackdown will be responsible for the content on our most profitable programs. You honestly think that the best way to handle a major staff change is to let it come down to chance?" only for someone else to just point at the WrestleMania sign hanging in the board room and he just shuts up.
Yes, this match is ridiculous on every level. But, and I say this through gritted teeth, I'm actually looking foreward to it. Let's go Team Johnny!
Winners: Team Johnny
Randy Orton vs. Kane
John Canton: I'm not a fan of this match at all. It screams lazy booking to me. Yes, I know they got that story from last year when Kane shook Randy's hand after a loss and that is a reason why he returned as the monster instead of the man. Wouldn't you rather see something fresh like Orton vs. Ziggler, though? Ziggler's an up and coming star that could have faced a top guy like Orton that he always has great matches with. Kane could have been on Johnny's team. It wouldn't have been hard to do that. Instead we'll get this match, which Orton will win in about 10 minutes with a thunderous RKO.
Winner: Randy Orton
Christian Michael: This is the old "we'll have these guys face each other because they don't have anything else to do". They both deserve to be on WrestleMania so, I don't have a problem with the match. The No Disqualification Match that Kane has referenced was really good. I think I rated it ***1/2 stars. The potential to have a good match is there. I doubt they'll get that much time. 5-7 minutes. RKO and it's over.
Predicted Winner- Randy Orton
Andrew Johnson: In what I've been calling the battle of the mentally ill, we have a psychotic trauma victim with a personality disorder, taking on a schizophrenic with severe anger issues. If this match were happening in 1997 in ECW it would be a blood bath. But, since this is WWE and everyone is a cartoon character, it's going to be an 8 minute echo of things that could have been. If Orton had a goatee and couldn't stop flipping people off, and Kane were about 10 pounds overweight and wearing an nWo shirt, I would swear this was WrestleMania X-8.
Winner: Randy Orton
WWE Title: Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk
John Canton: I'm a big fan of both guys and the idea that they are competing for the title of the "Best in the World." That's what the WWE Title is supposed to be about in the first place, right? I've liked the added story of Jericho mocking Punk's family whether he's telling the truth or lying because it has made the feud personal. It's pretty simple. If they get 20 minutes they have the potential to have the match of year. Since Jericho's come back, the only thing he's really won was the right to get the title shot here. He didn't win the Rumble or the Elimination Chamber. That's why I'm going with the Jericho win here. They can have the rematch at Extreme Rules too because that's in Punk's hometown of Chicago and I would think Punk would end the show with a win there. I know it's not that important to look ahead too far, but I think for the sake of the story Jericho should sneak a win to win the WWE Title here. It doesn't have to be a clean. I just think it would be smart to put him over.
Winner: Chris Jericho
Christian Michael: When this is the third most anticipated match on the card, you know how stacked this show is. If allowed, this could and should be a five star match. This feud was lacking some fire until Jericho degraded Punk's family. You need the babyface to be the sympathetic figure in a big match like this and now he is. The thing is can Jericho anger Punk enough that Punk makes a mistake and Jericho uses it to win the title. I can see it. I think Jericho steals the tile here and Punk ultimately wins the feud in a few months but WrestleMania is going to be Jericho's night.
Predicted Winner and NEW WWE Champion- Chris Jericho
Andrew Johnson: I know a lot of people are preemptively calling this the match of the night, but I'm not really feeling it. I like both Punk and Jericho, and I think they are going to have a great match, but something is telling me to hold off on making that assumption. As for the winner, while I think it would be cool to see Chris Jericho troll face his way out of WrestleMania with the title, I don't think it's going to happen. I think the most likely scenario --- at least in my imagination --- is that CM Punk will Pepsi Plunge Jericho's head off with the power of his new addiction: a can of cartoon spinach. Hey, when you come from a family of addicts, you're bound to have a vice. He yam what he yam, and that's all that he yam.
Winner: CM Punk
Hell in a Cell: The Undertaker vs. Triple H w/Shawn Michaels as Special Referee
John Canton: I'm excited about this one. First off, I don't think either guy is retiring. I know there's speculation about that, but why would they? Undertaker is wrestling one match per year these days anyway, so in many ways he's retired already. Why not keep wrestling one match per year, getting paid in the six figures for it and continuing your legacy? It's not like he's having bad matches either. He's had match of the year contenders the last four WrestleManias and that trend will likely continue here. In Hunter's case, he's a part-timer that can wrestle when the story calls for it. My point is I don't think this is "the end" for either guy.
As for the match, I'll pick Undertaker. Obviously I'm not going out on a limb with that selection. I think it will be a great match much like last year with Triple H beating him physically for the majority of the contest. However, I think Undertaker won't be carried out this time. He'll win the match and the war, so to speak. I don't expect Michaels to do that much. He's there to tease the possibility of doing something, but ultimately I doubt anything will happen with him as the referee. I think "End of an Era" means the last time these two will have a match, which is perfectly fine with me. I'd expect a 20-30 minute match that with video packages, entrances and post match happenings to extend the whole thing to 45-50 minutes just like last year. I have high expectations for it. Let's see what these two legends can do one more time.
Winner: The Undertaker
Christian Michael: There's no doubt in my mind that these two are going to beat the hell out of each other in this match. It would be nice to see some color added but I doubt that will happen. I could see this being the last match for either man but more likely for the Deadman. A key selling point in the match is what Shawn Michaels is going to do as the referee. The likely answer is he goes to Superkick Undertaker and hits HHH instead leading to Taker's win. There's little doubt in my mind as to the result I just want another classic. 20-0
Predicted Winner- The Undertaker
Andrew Johnson: In a match that's all about THIS BUSINESS and how THIS BUSINESS isn't going to be THIS BUSINESS anymore because all the really real strong men who aren't gay are the last of THIS BUSINESS.
Look, I think the build for this match sucks, and there's way too much attention surrounding The Undertaker's hair length, but I'm sure it will be good. Also, there will be blood, and not the Daniel Day Lewis kind.
Winner: The Undertaker
The Rock vs. John Cena
John Canton: I think you can make the argument that this is the most hyped match in the history of World Wrestling Entertainment. It's literally one year in the making. Most matches don't get nearly that much hype and if a match gets three months of hype we'd consider that to be great hype. I've been anticipating this match since it was announced over 50 weeks ago. I don't think it will be a technical classic, but I think it will be great in terms of the booking, the execution of the big spots and the ability to cause a great reaction from the crowd. These two know what they are doing in a big match situation and despite the "legit heat" they have I think they'll be able to work well together because they're two of the best ever at their job. Yes Cena haters, he is great at the big matches. It's okay. You can admit it.
What will happen in the match? A Cena win is my prediction. I think that while the crowd may not like the idea of Cena going over, it's a likely scenario because he's the main guy in WWE and a win for him against a guy that is as big as The Rock is beneficial for the long term success of WWE. I can see Rock winning too, of course. The crowd will be supportive of Rock way more than they will be Cena and I know some people are worried about what would happen if Cena won. I think Cena will win the hard fought match after each guy kicks out of a number of different finishers. Post match, I wouldn't be shocked if Rock shook Cena's hand as a way for him to say he respects Cena. I'm picking Cena on the assumption that there won't be a rematch. If there is a rematch, Rock winning would be more likely. As you can tell I'm pretty torn on this one. I'll go Cena, but I'm not that confident in my prediction.
Winner: John Cena
Christian Michael: Well, the wait is over. The most hyped and heavily built match in wrestling history is finally here. There's no doubt in my mind that these two will deliver the goods. Say what you want about Cena, but with the right opponent he can deliver a classic and I doubt Rock would have come back if he couldn't still bring it. Each man has their reasons for having to win this match. Much like the Warrior/Savage match at WrestleMania VII, this match means more than a championship. It is about legacy. Would the Hollywood star come back just to put over Cena? For the good of the company, I can't see any other way. Plus, I doubt this will be their only match no matter how many times WWE tells you it is once in a lifetime. Expect a wild ride in this match. The old school vs. the new school. It should be a lot of fun.
Predicted Winner- John Cena
Andrew Johnson: A lot of people didn't believe the WWE could book a match one year in advance and it work out, but it did. Whether you're on Team Bring It/Boots To Asses or are advocating the rise above hate, it doesn't matter: this match is going to be the balls. Will it be a classic hold for hold clinic? God no. But it's going to be memorable. It's going to be one of those things that's talked about forever. And on Sunday, we all get to experience it.
That is unless you have a shitty stream and it craps out on you. Shell out the 50 bucks, dammit!
Winner: John Cena
FINAL THOUGHTS
John Canton: I've never been more excited for a wrestling show in my 25 years of being a fan. The fact that I will be there live is the main reason, but I also really like the card. I think the event will be very good and has the chance of being great. I'll be back in the middle of next week with a review. Enjoy the show. I know I will.
Andrew Johnson: Whether you're new to wrestling or are a lifelong fan, it's hard not to get excited about WrestleMania. Card be damned, there is just something about that night that makes everything feel special. It's the showcase of the immortals, and it's the one night all true wrestling fans look foreward to every year. I hope you're as excited as we are.
Thanks for reading, and enjoy the show.
