The show starts with a video recap of SS. Shows DX beating Vince and Shane. Followed by Edge beating Cena.
Edge's music hits and he comes out in a black shirt and
jeans, wearing a suit jacket - He actually doesn't look like a
bum for once. He grabs a mic once entering the ring. He says
he's waited for this night his entire life. Everyone bought
tickets to see that Edge had lost the title. People in the cheap
seats, adults, kids, all wrong. He got down and asked a kid in
the front row if he thought his hero Cena would win the title.
Well, he was wrong.
Edge says that if he's still champion - Where's his belt
and his girlfriend? "You suck" chants.
He asks Lita if she's there.
She shows on the Titantron. She's at the harbor with her
belt and Edge's belt.
Edge says it's Cena's belt and it's time for a burial at
sea.
Lita kisses the spinner belt and then tosses it in the
water.
Edge calls for a new era. An era that's Rated 'R'. Smoke
pours down on his from the ceiling and then there's a belt
hanging in front of him. It's a spinner belt with a black
background in the middle, a red star and Raterd 'R' in the
middle.
He says the era of Cena was over and it's time for other
superstars to step up. Until then he's off to see his
girlfriend.
Stange music starts and Jeff Hardy comes out. {He looks
really good - Not at all too skinny or tired looking}. Jeff
rushes down to the ring and gets right in Edge's face.
Edge asks 'What the hell are you doing here Jeff Hardy?
Didn't you die like three years ago.' You're not making your
return at my expense. He tells him he should learn from his
looser older brother.
Jeff gets pissed and nails Edge. He then kicks Edge before climbing. When Jeff gets up top Edge rolls from the ring. Edge backs up the ramp while Jeff stands in a corner and screams at him.
- Commercial
Promo for Vince's new DVD.
Spirit Squad is in the ring. The Highlanders come out
along with Hacksaw and Eugene. Video from last week when the
Highlanders helped Hacksaw and Eugene beat the SQ.
Eugene, Rory and Robbie try to get in the ring.
Highlanders are pushed out and Eugene is attacked by the rest.
Johnny takes control of Euegene. He kicks Euegene and then slams
him in a corner. Eugene gets his ankles up on Johnny shoulders
and chops him on the top of the head to get free. Eugene
airplane spins and then {headbutts} tags in Robbie. Robbie
covers and then loses control.
Kenny tags in and covers for two. Mikey tags in and Kenny
flips him over onto Robbie for two. Mikey again covers for two.
Robbie throws some punches but gets kneed in the gut. Robbie
gets pushes into the heel's corner and they all grab at him. 'We
want Hacksaw' chants. Nicky tags in and arm wrenches Robbie.
Robbie throws punches but gets tossed into the heel corner and
Kenny tags in.
Kenny kicks Robbie in the head and nails a swinging
neckbreaker. Kenny climbs but misses his leg drop when Robbie
rolls. Robbie is able to tag in Rory and punches down anybody
wearing green. Everyone rishes in. everyone ends up outside
fighting and Robbie rushes in to help his cousin. They both grab
a mamber of SQ, springboard his legs off the ropes and suples
facedrop him to the mat. Rory covers for three.
- Winners: Rory, Robbie, Eugene & Hacksaw
Outback Coach is working out on his Bow-Flex.
Edge is screaming about Jeff Hardy. He wants to face Hardy tonight.
Coach asks if he wants to put his title on the line against Jeff.
Edge says he doesn't want to put his title on the line, but he wants Hardy in the ring.
Coach says he's in charge until Vince shows. He will make
it happen.
Edge leaves and Coach talks to himself about how he's going to have abs like Mr. McMahon.
Vince asks if DX has been seen. Vince is pissed about the
loss last night.
Shane says he was the legal man, not Vince. Therefore the
loss should be exponged from the record.
Vince likes that idea.
- Commercial
Outback Todd is with Orton. He says Orton sayed he'd beat
Hogan.
Orty says he beat Orton, doesn't matter that his feet were
on the ropes. Tonight he's going to take apart Flair.
Todd says Flair lost a lot of blood last night.
Orton says he doesn't care. He then looks off and asks
what he's looking at.
Carlito is standing there smirking. He banters on about
Hogan's feet being on the ropes.
Orty gets pissed about being interupted. He says Carlito's a nobody with a cheap gimick and a bad hair but. He tells Carlito next time he interupts he better give Orty the respect he deserves.
Orty walks away and Carlito glares at him taking a big bite of his apple.
HHH is sitting behind a magazine. He puts in down and says we probably wonder where they are tonight. After being attacked by cheerleaders, a leprechaun, a limey, a chubby giant and a canibal. They were heading to the show when they saw Vince's private jet flying over. From in front of the desk HHH is
sitting at, HBK flies a toy palne around.
HHH says they had to stop by and see the jet. HBK crashes
off the wall and falls to the floor.
Then it shows HHH and HBK heading into Vince's jet. HBK
scratches the paint job.
HHH asks if HBK has a clue how much a paint job like that
costs.
HBK says he has no idea. He asks HHH if Vince will notice
the scratch.
HHH says he doubts Vince will notice the scratch.
The camera pulls back and there's a huge DX spray painted
on the side in green. There's also another one on the tail.
Outback Shane and Vince are watching on a TV. Vince
screams and knocks the TV over.
- Commercial
WWE Rewind - Lita beating Mickie for the Woman's Title.
Trish's music hits and she comes down in a cut off white
wife beater and tight black pants. Victoria comes down in red
boy shorts and a tiny red top.
Vic slaps Trish in the face. Trish fights back with
forearms and a dropkick that lands Vic outside. Trish goes
outside, slams Vic down and throws punches. Trish slams her back
first into the ring post. Back in the ring Trish clotheslines
for two and then a victory roll for two.
Vic gets out of stratusfaction and covers Trish for two.
Vic slams Trish face first to the mat by her hair. Trish comes
back with head scissors and a clothesline for two. Vic nails
Trish in the temple with a knee. Vic climbs but Trish gets up on
her shoulders and nails a hurricanrana. Vic goes for the
widowspeak but misses.
Trish again goes for stratusfaction and nails it. Trish
covers for three.
- Winner: Trish
Trish starts to celebrate when Vince's music hits. Trish
quickly leaves the ring. King thinks he and JR should leave too.
Vince takes a mic and says he supposes we enjoy what DX did to his plane - Huge cheers.
He says it's a 30 million dollar plane. And we encourage their
degeneracy. 'You suck' chants.
Vince says DX sucks. He's called the cops and in a few
minutes we're going to watch DX get arrested at the airport.
'Asshole' chants.
- Commercial
Vince is pacing in the ring. He says they've waited long
enough. He says his cameras are there. We go to the airport.
DX is talking about a huge flag. HHH says they're on the
top of WWE Headquarters. HHH says Vince has done so much and
left his mark.
HBK says Columbus left his mark when he got here.
Neil Armstrong left his mark on the moon.
HBK says they're leaving their mark on the top of WWE
Headquarters.
They both yell off the side of the building. "If you're
not down with that, we have two words for you." The camera pans
out to show the building spray painted with a huge DX.
Vince slwly climbs through the ropes as Shane slides out
quickly to help his father. Vince looks like he's both in shock
and about to cry. The crowd starts singing, "Hey, hey, hey,
goodbye" as Shane and Vince leave.
- Commercial
This Week In Wrestling History - Aug 26, 1999 - First
episode of RAW. Undertaker, Shane, Mankind, Steph accepts
Tests's proposal. HHH retains against the Rock with HBK as the
special guest ref.
Shane and Vince are walking outback. Shane keeps muttering that he can't believe it.
Foley walks up and asks how Vince is doing.
Vince looks at Foley and says he called him Vince. Vince
also said Foley said he'd kiss his ass.
Shane says Foley also called him a son of a bitch.
Vince says he doesn't like him.
Foley gives him a goofy grin.
Vince says Foley going to join the club tonight.
They get in each other's faces. Foley says he knows
Vince's having a bad night, but so is Foley. His arm is screwed
up and he has 25 stitches in his chest.
Vince says he will do it or someone will be fired.
Jeff Hardy's music hits and Jeff comes out. Video of Edge
cutting down Matt to Jeff's face. {Damn, he looks really good,
and much more like his brother for some reason.} Edge comes
out with Lita.
Jeff baseball slides Edge as he approaches the ring, and
then dives over the top to take Edge down. Back inside
Jeff covers for two. Edge slides Jeff out under the ropes. Edge
goes outand brings Jeff back in. Jeff is down and Lita is in his
face taunting him. Edge rolls out and bends Jeff backward
around the ring post. Edge mocks the old Team Extreme hand
motion. Jeff gets whipped but gets his feet up in Edge's face.
Jeff climbs but Edge moves - Jeff lands on his feet. Edge nails
a neckbreaker on Jeff for two.
Lita's eyes don't match her character's mood. Jeff gets
whipped but climbs the ropes and nails a corkscrew sault for two.
Jeff throws punchs and ducks a clothesline. Jeff nails a twist
of fate. Edge is bleeding for the mouth and nose. Jeff climbs
and nails his swanton. Lita pulls Edge's foot to break up the
three and cause a DQ.
Cena rushes down and attacks Edge. Edge tries to run away
but Cena keeps grabbing him.
Edge gets tossed into plexiglass twice. Edge tosses Cena into a
garage door. Edge runs out the door with Cena hot on his tail.
- Winner: Jeff Hardy via DQ
- Commercial
Video of Jeff hitting the swanton, then Cena rushing in to
attack Edge. The Cena beating Edge all the way out of the arena.
JR and King talk about the kiss my ass club. JR isn't
happy about it.
Suddenly the camera shows Edge and Cena fighting outside by the water. Cena has the upper hand. Cena tells Edge to be one
with nature and slams him face first into a tree. He then
says he'll whip out the hose. Cena chokes Edge with a gardern
hose. Cena keeps pounding on Edge.
Cena's throwing punches as King calls for more help. They
are out on the docks. Cena's yelling that he isn't going
nowhere. Edge is about to fall into the water and fights back.
Finally Cena tells Edge it's time to swim and tosses him into the
water.
- Commercial
WWE Slam Of The Week - Two weeks ago, Kane against Shelton
for the number one contender slot.
Outback Melina is leaning her head on Foley's shoulder.
She thanked him for saving her from Flair.
He says it's no big deal.
Melina asks what he's going to do tonight. He needs tot
hink things through.
He says he's not sure he'll be able to look himself in the
mirror if he does it.
She says he'll be fired if he doesn't. She says he's
taught her so much. He's been her mentor. He needs to think
things through. She needs to go out to the ring with Johnny.
she hugs and kisses him on the cheek before leaving.
Nitro's music hits and he comes down to the ring with
Melina. Melina does her normal ring entrance. Kane comes down
to face him. JR says Edge's been rescued from the sound by the
marine patrol.
Nitro goes after Kane's face but gets body blocked to the
mat. Nitro gets backed into a corner, ducks to the apron and
then slides in between Kane's feet. He then runs into Kane's big
boot.
Kane gets backed into a corner and Nitro throws punches.
Kane tosses him to the mat. Nitro attempts a springboard
dropkick, but gets swatted away mid-air. Kane climbs and nails a
flying clothesline.
Suddenly Umaga rushes the ring and attacks Kane. Kane gets slammed to the mat face first. Umaga nails the Samoan spike on Kane and leaves him on the mat. Umaga and Estrada are
celebrating and Kane sits up.
Umaga kicks Kane and then headbutts him a couple times.
Umaga climbs and nails the Samoan spike from the top with a
sickening thud. Kane is coughing up blood, thick and dark.
Umaga is still yelling and celebrating.
- Winner: Nitro via DQ
- Commercial
Video of Layla winning the Diva Contest.
JR and King talk about the Kiss My Ass Club. JR talks
about how humiliating. They move on to talk about Cena's new
movie. They show the movie trailor.
Orton comes down to the ring.
- Commercial
Flair's music hits and he comes down to huge pop. Flair
enters the ring and Orty jumps out. Flair is covered with
bandages.
Orton tries to attack Flair from behind. He doesn't get
far. Orty suplexes Flair who moans in pain. Orty tries to
clothesline Flair over the top. It doesn't work so Orty has to
do it again. Flair climbs up on the apron and Orty dropkicks him
to the floor.
Orty goes out and suplexes Flair on the floor. Orty breaks the count and goes back after Flair. He rake shis boot across Flair's forehead. Orty then throws a bunch of punches. Back in the ring Orty stomps Flair. Orty kicks Flair fm the ring. Flair gets tossed into the stairs and can barely defend himself.
Flair's bleeding from the back of his head. Orty rolls Flair
back in the ring and stomps him again - Flair doesn't put up any
defense.
Orty gets cocky and Flair throws some chops. Flair goes
for a back body drop but gets a boot to eh sternum - It actually
seems to really hurt. Orty nails an RKO and covers Flair for
the win.
Orty then chokes Flair and rakes at his face. He's on top
of Flair who can't seem to defend himself. The ref reverses the
decision and makes Flair the winner. The ref holds up Flair's
hand and then gets chased out of the ring by Orty.
Flair tries to climb the ropes ot get to his feet. Orty
was setting Flair up for the RKO but Carlito drops an elbow into
Orty's back. Carlito nails a spring board back elbow on Orty who
quickly rolls fromt he ring.
- Winner: Flair by reversal
Video of Regal becoming the first member of the Kiss My Ass Club.
- Commercial
Foley is coming down to the irng with Melina on his arm.
Shane and Vince are already in the ring. Melina getsin the ring
but Foley stays outside.
Vince says Foley is the first candidate to bring a date to
Kiss My Ass.
Foley says he won't so it.
Vince says he will or be fired.
Foley says he loves this job, but doesn't need it. He says he has saved tons of money on aparel. He hasn't gotten a haircut in ten years. He drives a used minivan. Vince can fire him, it doesn't matter.
Vince says Foley didn't hear him correctly. He said
someone will be fired, not Foley. Vince says Melina will be fired.
Foley says that no one is worth doing this for - Except
Melina.
Melina begs her not to do it. He says his career has been
long while her's is just starting. She's going to be a huge
superstar. He'd spoken to her three times before asking his
wife to make Melina the God Mother of Hewey. He will do it and
they will go buy a big bottle of mouthwash, then a huge bottle of
booze. Melina stands there crying.
Foley yells at Vince to drop his draws - NOW! He screams
and yells at Vince who looks shocked and drops his draws.
Foley pulls Vince's skivvies to the side and plants one on his bum.
Vince talks to Foley after and Melina slowly walks behind
Foley. She gets down on one knee and gives Foley a low blow.
Foley falls to the mat and Melina goes to stand between Shane
and Vince.
Vince says that, like DX, they have two words for Foley.
Melina leans into the mic and yells, "You're fired!"
The three of them walk up the ramp together, laughing, with Melina in the middle. Vince talks his whole way out of the
arena. He talks about how people have kissed his ass, patted his
ass, and he's gotten an ass-ial. He hands Melina off to Nitro
grinning. He slaps Torrie on his ass on the way by.
Once they get out the door Vince stops dead and looks like
he's going to cry. He tells Shane that he thinks DX has broken
him. First the plane.
Shane says they will have it repainted.
Vince says he loves that plane. Then Vince asks about the
WWE Headquarters.
Shane says they'll make DX pay.
They are about to climb in the limo when Vince yells at the driver for not wearing a tie - For that they should fire him.
The limo takes off and there's a long chain trailing from
it. The limo gets to a certain point and the whole back axel is
pulled from the back of the limo. Of course the limo stops dead
and the back slams to the ground.
The driver gets out and goes around the back of the car.
Shane falls out of the limo, opposite side from whence they entered, holding his head.
Vince falls out after his son holding his head too. Vince starts screaming at the driver, asking what he hit.
The driver is shocked saying that the back of the car fell
off.
Shane's jaw falls and he points to the car. Vince's face
crumbles. The camera pulls back and there's a big DX in green
spray paint on the side.
Biggest pop
DX
Flair
Jeff Hardy
Cena
Biggest heat
McMahons & Melina
Orton
Edge & Lita
