WWE Heat Report (04/01/07) Taped in Chicago, Illinois

WWE Heat Report-1st April 2007
By Shaun Best-Rajah.Com Reporter
Commentators: Todd Grisham & Jonathan Coachman
Ring Announcer: Lilian Garcia

Just hours away from WrestleMania come on in and join me for Heat. The final stop en-route to the grandaddy of them all. Three matches on show. Let's get things popping with..............

Charlie Haas vs Val Venis
Haas comes out alone. Val bows to the crowd before towelling a girl in the front row. Coachman thought he was going to towel a male. Heat has apparently gone x-rated this morning as the audio fails to edit out the guy next to the towelled girl saying fuck yeah LOL. Grisham and Coachman explain Val's recent victory over Haas resulting in Haas requesting a rematch. Good logical booking. A tussle to the corner leads to a clean break as Haas smiles at Val. Val reverses a Haas hammerlock and side headlock before scoring with a shoulder tackle. Val with a hiptoss counter and armdrag takedown into an armbar. Val applies a hammerlock but Haas gets up into the ropes to break. Haas elbows Val then rams his head into the corner before punching. Val reverses Haas off the ropes. Val follows through with two running kneelifts and a side russian legsweep for a nearfall. Val works over the arm with kneedrops and applies an armwringer. Coachman puts over Haas' past as a stockbroker and Val's political radio show. Haas takes Val to the ropes, perches him on top then pushes him to the outside. Haas pulls Val back in at a referee's four count. Haas works on the back with elbows then rams Val into the corner twice. Haas pushes Val off the ropes to punch the back. Coachman puts over the day after WrestleMania as a new year and fresh slate for guys like Haas and Val to make an impression. Sounds patronising to me. Haas delivers knees and elbows to Val's back in-between a series of sitting chinlocks. Haas breaks from a third chinlock to deliver a knee and ram Val into the corner. Val fights back with punch counters. Haas rakes the face but runs into a gut punch. Val lands a neckbreaker which puts both men down. Val gets up first and builds momentum with a clothesline, two backelbows and backbodydrop off the ropes. Val boots the gut and lands a fisherman suplex for a nearfall. Val punches Haas into the corner who reverses an Irish whip. Val sidesteps a charge, Haas hits the corner, Val hits a swinging sitout powerbomb for another nearfall. Haas pulls Val's trunks to send his head into the corner. Haas schoolboys Val and grabs the ropes 1-2-no the referee sees it. Haas argues with the referee then runs into a half nelson slam. Val heads up top. Haas headbutts Val then goes up to meet him. Val punches and shoves Haas off. Val goes for the Money Shot but Haas gets his knees up. Haas lies back into a lax cover 1-2-hold on Val reverses it and hooks the leg 1-2-3. Val steals it. Great opener as Val gets back-to-back wins against Haas. These two work really well and should both be in line for a push. Here is Your Winner: VAL VENIS. Post match Val rolls outside as Haas stays in the ring in shock.

Cryme Tyme vs Steve Boz & Eddie Venom
Grisham says Cryme Tyme will be in Detroit for WrestleMania and will get their voice heard despite not being on the card. The announcers make note of Lilian delaying ACL surgery on her knee until after WrestleMania saying its an instance of putting the business before health. Shad puts his cap on the referee who takes it off quickly. The Jobbers aren't distinguished yet again but I know who's who. Boz looks a lot like Kid Kash. JTG gets the crowd into it before starting with Boz. A lockup leads to the ropes. Boz reverses JTG off the ropes who ducks a clothesline, leapfrogs Boz then lands a corkscrew backelbow. Boz runs into a backbodydrop. JTG Irish whips, charges, Boz gets a boot up but JTG outsmarts him by sliding to the outside. JTG trips Boz then lands a leg lariat from the second rope. Coachman likes how Cryme Tyme always start with JTG then send in the muscle with Shad. JTG takes Boz to the corner to elbow. Shad tags in elevating JTG onto his shoulders before ramming him into Boz in the corner. Shad boots Boz before hitting a double underhook suplex. Venom tags in, Shad ducks a lunge and hits an atomic drop. Shad scoops Venom up for snake eyes in the corner followed by a running forearm. JTG tags back in to snapmare then step over Venoms' face twice. JTG hits a running boot to the head for a nearfall. JTG plays to the crowd. JTG runs the ropes, Boz knees the back, JTG punches him off the apron but falls victim to a couple of bearhugs by Venom. JTG manages to elbow free, roll under a clothesline and make the hot tag. Shad goes wild with clotheslines galore to both Jobbers. Shad fires up, removes his bib and catches Venom in a sidewalk slam. Shad clotheslines Boz over the top rope then drops an elbow onto Venom. Cryme Tyme high five then finish Venom with the G9 which Grisham actually makes reference to. Shad covers for the academic 1-2-3. Coachman says 2007-08 could be Cryme Tyme's year and puts them at the top of the list for people to watch. Cryme Tyme extend their heat run to 7-0 in as many weeks. Grisham says Sports Entertainment could be going to the ghetto. Here Are Your Winners: CRYME TYME. It's a shame the writers have seemingly gone cold on Cryme Tyme who despite this remain very over with the crowd.

Shelton Benjamin vs Super Crazy
Main Event time. Shelton comes out alone. Crazy's music now has a modified voiceover at the start saying he's Super, Crazy and Super Crazy. The announcers gush about Crazy's fast paced moves. Shelton works over Crazy with a knee, boots and punches to begin. Shelton shoves Crazy down off the ropes. Crazy comes back with a shove of his own off the ropes followed by a twisting armdrag. Crazy continues with a wheelbarrow bulldog into a snapmare followed by a low dropkick to the face for a nearfall. Shelton reverses off the ropes, Crazy hangs on before booting Shelton in the head. Shelton backdrops a charging Crazy onto the apron. Shelton knees then flips over the top rope looking to powerbomb Crazy off the apron who hangs on. Crazy punches and boots Shelton away before landing an asai moonsault from the second rope. Crazy soaks up the fanfare. Both men land punches before Shelton goes back inside. From the ring apron Crazy manages to bring Shelton's head down across the top rope. Crazy goes to the top rope, Shelton leaps up connecting with an enziguiri kick before covering for a nearfall. Shelton stomps Crazy then works over his head with punches. After a knee to the head Shelton chokes Crazy with his boot on the mat in the corner. Crazy fights back with forearms but runs into a boot to the head. Following a nearfall Shelton goes to a rear naked choke. Crazy backelbows free, Shelton drives knees into the gut then Irish whips and lands a stinger splash. Crazy falls to the mat, Shelton drives his forearm into Crazy's face. Both men get some shots in before both men on their knees exchange shots. Crazy runs into a spinebuster for a nearfall. Shelton hits a botched (on Crazy's part) powerbomb for another nearfall before applying a long rear naked choke/chinlock which loses the crowd. Crazy eventually escapes following multiple slaps to the face. Crazy lands punches, Shelton reverses off the ropes, Crazy ducks a clothesline then hits a tilt-a-whirl headscissors to wake up the crowd. Crazy keeps up the fast pace with a dropkick and clothesline. Crazy goes for a suplex, Shelton tries to counter into a hangmans neckbreaker but Crazy shoves Shelton off the ropes into a spinning heel kick. Crazy hits a standing moonsault 1-2-no. Crazy signals a high risk move and goes up top. Shelton leaps up top but Crazy punches him down then connects with a missile dropkick. Cover 1-2-3. Frustrating match. I wish it could have stayed at a fast pace throughout. The restholds and Shelton's plodding killed the crowd. Here is Your Winner: SUPER CRAZY. A fruitless week for the World's Greatest Tag Team.

An out of breath Grisham says he'll see us at WrestleMania 23 as Heat fades to black. End of Show.

Best Match: Charlie Haas vs Val Venis.
Worst Match: None.
Frustrating Match: Shelton Benjamin vs Super Crazy.
Verdict: Thumbs in the middle.

WrestleMania Predictions
John Cena vs Shawn Michaels (WWE Title)
I can't wait to see this match as it can go either way. The build has been first class. I can see Michaels getting the win with Triple H coming out for a massive post match DX celebration. However I can see Cena retaining, giving him the rub of beating both DX members clean in successive years. I'm leaning towards Cena retaining as Michaels got the last word on Raw with the superkick. Like him or hate him Cena's going to be around for a while as the WWE posterboy. Personally I like the guy. He handles the pressure with ease and carries himself like a true champion unlike his hotheaded egotistical SmackDown! opposite. Prediction: JOHN CENA.

Batista vs The Undertaker (World Heavyweight Title)
Title vs Streak. I hope to god Batista loses and turns heel. His face run is way overdone. His matches have been terrible as have his promos since his return last summer. I'm sick of seeing the spinebuster of doom and his boring matches. Undertaker on the other hand is on fine form and deserves this one last run with the title. Long term he's not the answer on SmackDown! but he should gain the upper hand over Batista and could then feud with Umaga who could draft over to the blue brand. I'm pulling for the deadman here. Unfortunately this match shouldn't go on last. That should be the WWE Title Match as it seems like the proper main event to me. Prediction: THE UNDERTAKER.

Bobby Lashley vs Umaga (Special Referee: Stone Cold Steve Austin)
Lashley is currently getting the push of his life. Not everyone is sold on him yet but I'm willing to give him a chance. Granted he's not the best choice to head up ECW (but with Rob Van Dam & CM Punk in a contract dispute or the victim of politics) he'll do. Someone will get their head shaved and it has to be Vince. He's been running his mouth to the point of overkill on TV. So, no doubt that Lashley wins here. I can see maybe Umaga and/or Estrada getting shaved before but one of the billionaires has to get shaved as it's been advertised to the mainstream and WWE has to make good on their promise. Vince's facials will make for some good TV and he'll spend the next few weeks on TV in denial and provide us with some more fun. As for Austin's involvement I predict a few heels will run in which means it'll be Stunners and Steveweisers all around. Prediction: BOBBY LASHLEY.

Edge vs Randy Orton vs Matt Hardy vs Jeff Hardy vs CM Punk vs Finlay vs King Booker vs Mr Kennedy (Money in the Bank)
This is the match I'm looking forward to the most. The extra two men won't take away from the concept. Hopefully Edge is ready to go and isn't sidelined. The Hardys will be the bumpers, Finlay will keep things running smoothly, and CM Punk will enter an eyecatching display but just fall short. I don't see King Booker winning. I wonder what stunts Jeff Hardy will pull out? As for winners it's either Edge or Mr Kennedy. Edge is a possibility to keep up his perfect Mania record (currently 5-0). You could have Orton then cost Edge his title opportunity to kickstart their feud. The other contender is Mr Kennedy who could steal it via the back door as Rated RKO scrap then draft to Raw and feud with Cena. I'm on the spot here so I'll go with Edge. Prediction: EDGE.

ECW Originals vs ECW New Breed
Apparently WWE want to phase out the ECW originals which is something I'm strongly against. I'll be pulling for the originals in my Sandman shirt but I've got the feeling the New Breed will win. Admittedly, I don't mind Elijah Burke and Monty...I mean Marcus Cor Von is alright but Kevin Thorn and Matt Striker are the pits. I can't believe they get on the card when so many others with a lot more talent and upside are left in the cold. I expect this one to not go that long. Give it ten minutes and make it extreme rules and I'll be happy. Oh yeah and even if it's for one night stop burying RVD. It would also be nice to hear Joey Styles yell "Oh My God". Not heard it in a while. Prediction: THE NEW BREED.

Chris Benoit vs MVP (U.S Title)
These two have been battling on house shows and even in the rain in Mexico and reports state it's been good. MVP is someone who has really grown on me and I've liked his recent showcases against "champions" of the world. With rumours of Benoit going to Raw I expect a title change here. Give the match some time and not a screwy ending and let Benoit go work his magic and you'll have a good match. Prediction: MVP.

Kane vs The Great Khali (Monster vs Monster)
This one ain't going to be pretty. Hopefully they'll keep it short. I don't see a point for Khali and his limited moves. He's awful in the ring, has no mic skills and can hardly speak a lick of English. Come on Kane. Prediction: KANE.

Melina vs Ashley (Lumberjill Match-Women's Title)
The Women's title meets Playboy. I'd rather have London & Kendrick on the card than Ashley. I bet Mickie James and Victoria are disappointed to be out of the match. Their effort on Heat last week was great. I'll admit the Lumberjills will be good to look at. Melina is competent in the ring but is no Trish Stratus. Ashley has had Melina's number on TV so I'll go with Melina to retain. Prediction: MELINA.

So that's my take. On the whole I'm really looking forward to WrestleMania. I wish there were more matches and that some more titles were being defended but you can't have everything. I feel for some of the people left off of the card as some have taken it a lot harder than others (Carlito). Tonight truly is the New Year's Eve of Sports Entertainment. If you're not a fan of times like this then you're mad in all honesty.

That's a wrap for me this week. Whoever you are, wherever you are enjoy WrestleMania tonight. See you back here next week for Heat. Shaun.

Comments/praise/feedback/criticism/discussion points please direct to shaunmb1@hotmail.com.